Yes, the HOLIDAYS are upon us. Through the years I have whittled away at their control of my time and energy. I have! My tree and decorations have been downsized to the mantel and can be put in a couple of shoe boxes. I do like the lights out on the porch. It is dark now for a few months. Any light is a helpful addition to my moods.
Still, the energy I have in these dark months will likely be sucked up pretty easily, and since my energy is limited as it is, I am forgiving myself ahead of time if I do not post three or four times a week here. This is acceptance. I forgive you too, ahead of time, for not finishing everything you hoped for in the coming weeks and even months. You are forgiven. I am forgiven. We are all forgiven.
Let this absence not fool you though. In fact, I am working on Kosmic Egg Project every day. I have a plan! It is such a thrill because I have been known to daydream my way right out of projects like this many, many times. I am hopeful that having and acting on this plan will keep me on track for three months.
This is the plan: A DRAFT/SKETCH of a card and what my intention for that card is each day. Not the perfect finished card and writing, but a real start. The way I will do the 5 cards (yes I get a weekend!) will be to draft up all the 1’s, then all the 2’s, then all the 3’s and so on. Obviously, I can only do this through 14 weeks (The Majors that can also include a card from each suit). After that, there will be 9 days (2 weeks) to finish the remaining cards, plus the back-side. Now we have to subtract Christmas and New Year’s and possibly December 21st and possibly a few others for obvious reasons, so I think it will work out okay. In reality, we are looking at about four months.
It is excruciatingly hard to put my own goals first after years of just being happy to get dinner on the table and most of the laundry folded. The reason has been having my health surprise me over and over. In the few windows of wellness I’ve had, I have decided to get too much done and then had a health set back. So, thinking of drafts and sketches, I’m making sure I pace myself. Yes. Pacing. If it turns out to be too much to do 5 cards a week, I will cut that in half. Whatever I need to do to keep progress happening. The important thing is progress, and being honest and kind to my intentions and my own body.
Once I finish a draft/sketch of each and every one of them, then I will choose some of the best draft/sketch’s and build them up, polish them, and decide whether to submit them to one of the three major Tarot Publishers. That is a long way off. Maybe six months. Six months. Do you see how I started out with three months and now it is doubled, but I’m trying to gather around me and through me a reality where things get done. We don’t know what will come up between now and then.
Meanwhile, I am taking some online writer’s classes, art branding studies, and Adobe Illustrator tutorials. I hope my website, drafts, and sketches will show all this increasingly. I feel thrilled by it all, and a little scared that the holidays will knock me out of this. Send prayers. I want to see this through. Do you know what I mean?